Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Another Amazing Happenstance

So my life is very odd--coincidences happen to me all the time, and once again I've found myself privileged to be be a victim of happenstance.

Some of you may recall a recent post in which I spoke of my growing stalker tendencies. This post was a result of being ignored by another guy on OKcupid.

Well, about two weeks later, I was "matched" by the "Quiver Match" system to a guy named Spencer. I decided to write him based primarily on his use of the phrase "Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints" as an exclamation in one section of his profile.  I mentioned that I thought it was funny, probably because I had been raised LDS.

Well, he wrote back inquiring about my experience with the Mormon Church, and whether my departure had been dramatic and sudden or more of a drifting away. He also mentioned seeing a one man show about an ex-Mormon. I responded and told him it was pretty sudden on the outside, but very gradual inside, and that the show to which he was referring was probably either "Confessions of a Mormon Boy" or "Missionary Position" by Steven Fales. I provided him a link my blog, specifically the post about Missionary Position, and extend the invitation for him to read more to get a better idea of my journey.

Anyway, to make a long story short (too late), we get to talking. And he casually asks me,

"What was the name of the guy you were stalking, the editor in NoHo?"

"His name was Brandon, I think."

"He's my best friend." 

Uh oh.

"But I won't tell!"

Sigh of relief.

Except he did tell him. He mentioned to Brandon that "there's this blog I'm reading that you should check out--but don't be surprised if some of it seems familiar"

Yeah, so I have had both of these fellows reading my blog. Hi guys! Is the gay community really that small? I guess so. At least the gay editing community--that's me, Brandon and Clint so far!

Anyway, I don't really care that he told Brandon about this blog, I'm sure he was amused to learn how his inaction caused my angst-written blog post, and that's dandy.

I've continued to converse with Spencer, and he's a really awesome guy who I have great conversations with. I look forward to our chats and it aggravates me to know that he's moving to Sacramento in a month, because I feel like he could be a really good friend, and I don't feel like I have any really close gay friends. :(

So what continues to bother me is that these two guys are close friends, and undoubtedly have a lot in common and get along really well. So chances are, if I'm getting along well with one, I'd probably get along well with the other. So it makes it all the more damning to think that there's cool gay people who could potentially be awesome friends with me right in my own section of LA, and yet I remain not merely boyfriendless, but "gay best friendless". :(



  1. You're an awesome guy and the little brother I shoulda had.

    Appreciate yourself for who you are, and others will too. You have a lot of good qualities, and other than the annoying habit you've got of unfair self-criticism, I don't see any downside to being pals with you.

    If you do find someone you really like, go after them big-time, but if the rejection is more than just short term (what women call 'playing hard to get') move on and don't waste your resources on black holes. There are lots of fish.

    People in L.A. are superficial assholes - gay and straight - that's something neither of us can change. It might be harder to find a decent person to run around with, but I'm sure it's possible. Try going away for weekends to places like San Diego or Las Vegas (don't go to St. George tho') and see if you can find someone more *normal* in these locations.

    Above all, enjoy the single life. Soon enough you'll have a family. Now is the time to play the field and sow your wild oats.

  2. from personal experience yes the gay community is a small one and word travels fast in some circles. have heart though, you will find your own group of gay friends soon enough, and a the right boyfriend in time!